A case for *not* going all in
You're still a runner even if you skip your run today.
Some athletes do it all. They get in every mile, finish every threshold repeat, never miss a lift or skip their PT, and actually warm up. I (Alexis) am not that athlete.
This feels especially true among sub-elite female runners. It makes sense; chasing big goals like a sub-3 marathon or an Olympic Trials qualifier requires a lot of work. I follow women who hop on the treadmill at 9 p.m. after their kids go to bed, or who spend the afternoon at work still sweaty after a lunchtime lift. I have so much respect for the work and sacrifice required to juggle training with everything else (especially for parents!) but again, I am not that athlete.
Don’t get me wrong: I work hard, and I make sacrifices for my goals. But I’ve learned the hard way that when running becomes my number one priority, I lose the joy. My motivation slips. It’s just not sustainable for me to put running first all the time. I can go “all in” for a training cycle or two, but then I need a reset. I love running, but I also love the other parts of my life.
Rest days used to be hard for me because of my past relationship with food and my body. Now, I’ve made peace with them—and honestly, I love them. I look forward to my Monday afternoons of doing nothing after work and having time to myself. Still, I sometimes question those extra rest days, not because of old patterns but because of the comparison trap. If she can get on the treadmill at 9 p.m. after working and caring for kids, surely I can’t skip a run just because I had a two-hour meeting after school, right? And sometimes I feel guilty when I simply don’t want to run. Usually I go anyway because once I’m out the door, it feels good. But after a long workday, sometimes I don’t want to do anything.
The internet would have you believe that everyone is jazzed about every run they’ve ever done. No lack of motivation anywhere! But it’s not a comparison game.
When I zoom out, I can shift my perspective. Maybe that late-night treadmill session truly helps her decompress. Maybe she’s in a season where going “all in” feels exciting and worthwhile. Maybe she’s struggling with something deeper and presenting a different picture on the outside. It’s not my business.
My business is this: I’m in a place where I still want to achieve big goals, but I also want the freedom to rest.
Work has been chaotic recently, and I’ve probably skipped or shortened at least one run a week for the past six-ish weeks. That’s okay. I’ve had seasons of big sacrifices for big goals, but right now, this isn’t that season.
If you struggle with comparison or the pressure to do it all, take this as your permission slip (if you need it) to slow down, especially heading into the holidays.
Remember: it’s okay to take unplanned rest days. It’s okay to shorten a run. It’s okay to lack motivation. It’s okay not to want to make sacrifices for your goals.
For almost all of us, running is just a hobby—and you’re still a runner even if you feel like skipping your run today.
On the Lane 9 Podcast Recently
“If I have REDs, should I still run the marathon?” A Q&A episode with co-founder Heather Caplan RDN answering two listener questions.
And Melissa Lodge PhD, REDs researcher, shares a fueling, training, and racing recap from running her first marathon, a 2:51:45 at the 2025 Wineglass Marathon.
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